In choosing these sentences I have realized that I don't have particularly remarkable opening and closing lines to my stories. Maybe that is cause for concern and maybe it isn't.
I haven't started anything new yet this year but here is the opening line of a long piece I hope to finish this year:
The wind rushed through the window of Orkney castle in a gust.
And here is the last line to the short story I finished last November:
She folded herself into his arms and the fire in her veins spread into his, both of their hearts beating in the same quick rhythm.
Thank you Summer for hosting this blogfest and Happy Birthday!
Aslo if you like showcasing fun little pieces of your work scroll down to check out my Topsy Turvy challenge.
Love the second one especially- very romantic! Great blogfest entry.
ReplyDelete~bru
I really like the second one, it holds so much. Thank you fairy much for participating
ReplyDeleteBoth are strong. If you want to make the first one more powerfull, place your period after "castle." The fact that the wind rushed through the window already tells us that it was a "gust". Sometimes less is more and it takes most of us years to learn this.
ReplyDeleteI liked both your sentences and agree with Wendy's advice for the first one. The second sentence is remarkable - it grabbed my interest and I'm intrigued to read more!
ReplyDeleteThis is a great Blogfest post. Your opening has an interesting sense of foreshadowing about it. The ending is warm and sweet - my favourite combination.
ReplyDeleteHi
ReplyDeleteI'm coming in from Summer's blogfest!
First line - Very atmospheric first sentence!
Last line - awwww how romantic!! Loved it! Take care
x
Second sentence is really cool. I would definitely read on.
ReplyDeleteDropping by for the blogfest-- looks like you've gotten some good advice and your sentences are good!
ReplyDeleteFun sentences. Looks like you've got interesting stories behind them. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you all for stopping by and for comments :D
ReplyDeleteI like them both but I LOVED the second one!
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean. I don't tend to have last sentences that look terribly good by themselves, and while I think that I have some good first sentences for stories that I've already started, somehow it was hard to come up with a good first sentence for something brand new. Maybe it was the pressure of the moment!
ReplyDeleteYour opening line sounded great, it could work well for a Scottish ghost story, I think. And your ending sounds very magical and romantic.
Thanks for sharing your words in this blogfest. I signed up late for the New Beginnings fun, but I'd love to hear what you think of my two sentences.